Seattle Woman Gets Stiffed on Sriracha, Calls Cops
You gotta hand it to her, she never lost focus
Sriracha, everyone’s favorite chili-based sauce from Thailand, has become a staple of American food culture. While Sriracha has shown up everywhere from in our mayo to on our kale these days, one Seattle woman had to resort to drastic measures to make sure she got enough of this magic sauce on her pizza.
According to reports, things got a little too spicy late on Sunday night/Monday morning at a pizzeria in Capitol Hill, one of Seattle’s trendier neighborhoods. A 36-year-old woman had no choice but to call 911, telling the operator that employees were “yelling at her and calling her names.” By the time officers arrived on the scene, they spotted the woman and a companion of hers in a scuffle with a third individual, who proceeded to throw a garbage can at the duo. Though this third party was arrested for assault, his opinions regarding Sriracha and its place on pizza remain unavailable as of press time.
Despite her involvement in a more serious criminal complaint, the original caller had only one thing on her mind: “Restaurant staff asked officers to remove the 36-year-old woman as she had reportedly created a ‘disturbance inside when she did not receive what she believed to be an adequate amount of Sriracha sauce,’” says the Seattle PD police blotter entry. “The woman... ‘kept bringing up’ the Sriracha issue as officers were attempting to investigate the incident,” noting that she “also ‘attempted to divert [the] investigation from the assault to her irritation with the pizza parlor and her treatment’ by an employee “with the tattoos on the face.’”
It’s easy to get a little irritated when our pizza orders aren’t perfect. But not since McDonald’s tried to appease a bunch of unruly cartoon fans has a lack of Asian-themed sauce caused such pandemonium. Hopefully this brush with infamy can inspire our unnamed hero to campaign for greater Sriracha acceptance in 2018 at pizza parlors all across this great nation.